Ten things women couldn't do before the 1970s

[VickiK]

My mom got a job for a title company when I was entering my teens, and retired from that company with a pension. Over the years, the job kept her sane(r) when things at home were turbulent. It was just a clerical position, but it was important for the sense of pride and independence it gave her. I wish she could remember her days there, maybe the memories would help to lighten her days now.

 

[Jenny]

My mom went to college for engineering, where she was the only girl in the classes. Her professors referred to the students as Mr. so and so, and refused to acknowledge she was female.

She lasted a year, then went home, got married, and went back to school when we were kids. Got her bachelor's when I was 10 and my first semester at college was her last semester for her master's.

 

[bounceswoosh]

My grandma went back to school to become a RN (registered nurse) in her 50s.

My mom switched from a full-time job at a mortgage company to a part-time job stocking cosmetics so that she could have a flexible schedule after I was born.

My sister in law raises four kids as her primary job.

They're all amazing people. I love that we have choices.

 

[mustski]

I agree choices! The most important thing is that women can choose what they want to do as a career. Men aren't that free actually. We are a backwards family .. I followed a career and DH has stayed home with DS. He attended the teacher conferences, went to the doctor and dentist appointments, chaperoned the school field trips, shuttled to sports practices, etc. He always received a lot of strange looks from the "chaperone moms" and even the pediatrician was known to comment. Each family should be free to choose what works without everyone acting like it's their business in the first place. Now that DS is in high school, DH works seasonally. We just call him "semi retired." No one judges a middle aged man that is semi-retired. That is the definition of success in the male world -53 and semi-retired. LOL!

 

[abc]

I agree choices! The most important thing is that women can choose what they want to do as a career. Men aren't that free actually.

The acceptence will come slowly, as more men stay home and their wives brings home the bacon. Much the same way when women first go out to work!

The difference is, men are free to choose. He may not get the acceptence but at least he's free to choose, if he can ignore them.

Women didn't get to choose before. They just couldn't get the work. Now that women are free to choose to work, they're also free to choose to stay home.

The irony is, plenty of men are quite happy to stay home and take the kid to school. It's the other Moms that give them the strange look! Women judge others more than men do and the acceptance to men doing women's job might take LONGER than men accepting women as their co-workers.

Since we can't legislate acceptance, stay-home-men will have to fight the battle on their own.

 

[mustski]

As long as men view women as "sex objects" and other men as "success objects" the problem will continue. That's life. We deal and move on.

 

[abc]

As long as men view women as "sex objects" and other men as "success objects" the problem will continue. That's life. We deal and move on.

The "sex object" part is changing. It's the "success object" that hasn't changed.

And it's not just men who view other men as "success objects". Women are just as guilty (some say more so) of that!

How many women, or divas right here, will go out on a date and say "I've got a decent job and I can take care of you if you want to be a ski bum, just make sure dinner is ready and dishes are clean", raise your hand? ;-)

 

[MaineSkiLady]

Within the last couple of months, PBS ran a fascinating documentary on the evolution of the whole movement of women's rights in this country. Might be available online.

I do like how this thread has trended: from the "can't do" to the "CAN do" - and stories of how some of our relatives/moms fought the mores of the day to become successful in their chosen fields. Great stories!

 

[Pequenita]

No, but having female athlete role models (professional or not) will help inspire young female athletes at the grassroots level. They are not mutually exclusive. Inspiration comes from that which we may not be able to achieve, as a child at least. Most of us as adults don't take on skiing thinking we can go to the Olympics, but if I had started ski racing as a child I probably would have my female ski role models and autographed posters on the wall.

In fact, now that I think about it, I only dabbled a bit in sports as a child, and I can't think of ever seeing or hearing of professional women's sports. Little boys say when they grow up they want to be a baseball player, but little girls can't even do that. Having a heavier media presence of women's sports would enable a little girl to be inspired to do some sport that maybe she wouldn't have been interested in before. How many little girls in the 80s were inspired to take up Gymnastics because of watching Mary Lou Retton at the Olympics? Those little girls probably got a lot of confidence from doing a sport that they saw their role model do on the worldwide stage....

Yep. I started gymnastics in 1980. First, I thought I was going to be the next Nadia. But by the 1984 Olympics, I was convinced I was the next Mary Lou. Hee hee.

 

[RachelV]

How many women, or divas right here, will go out on a date and say "I've got a decent job and I can take care of you if you want to be a ski bum, just make sure dinner is ready and dishes are clean", raise your hand? ;-)

If you can find me the men that have the self-confidence to be on the receiving end of that statement, I will happily give it a shot and let you know how it goes. ;)

 

[abc]

If you can find me the men that have the self-confidence to be on the receiving end of that statement, I will happily give it a shot and let you know how it goes. ;)

You would have to move back to New York first!

(And you probably have to be on a bike in order to meet them. So many of my male biking buddies are in that camp it's not even funny! Maybe that's where the more confident man hang out, in the less popular sport like cycling/x-c skiing.)

 

[Slidergirl]

In the early 70's, my women's swim team in college at UCLA had to sleep 4 to a room on road trips. Dinners were usually McDonalds or a trip to a market and get PB&J or tuna to make sandwiches. The men's team were 2 to a room and had a set training table.
Here's one that's not sports-related: Girls couldn't wear pants to school. How's that one? I remember being in the school revolt to allow us to wear pants. I even wrote a letter to the editor (of the local paper) making my case for allowing pants. We also couldn't wear skirts or dresses that didn't touch the floor when kneeling or be at least finger-tip length. We had to have 2 different wardrobes: pants and mini-skirts/dresses after school and "too long for the 60s & early 70s" skirts/dresses for school. Or, you rolled the waistband of your skirt to make it shorter...

 

[abc]

In the early 70's, my women's swim team in college at UCLA had to sleep 4 to a room on road trips. Dinners were usually McDonalds or a trip to a market and get PB&J or tuna to make sandwiches. The men's team were 2 to a room and had a set training table.

That's interesting!

I was the lone female student in my class of a "male dominated major". Male students all teamed up to share rooms when we go to conferences (paid for by the department). I took it upon myself to find other women students from other universities to share hotel. That is, until one of my fellow MALE student pointed out to me, I should not be expected to do EXTRA work to attend conferences. If there were no female student in my own department, the department should be expected to pay for my single room cost! I thought about it for a bit and decided to try it on for size (i.e. asked the responsible person about it). Sure enough, that was the expectation. They would gladly pay for my hotel in a room by myself!

The principle of gender equality has many manifestations depending on the circumstance. It's up to those involved to interprete it. Never automatically take no for an answer.

 

[mustski]

In the early 70's, my women's swim team in college at UCLA had to sleep 4 to a room on road trips. Dinners were usually McDonalds or a trip to a market and get PB&J or tuna to make sandwiches. The men's team were 2 to a room and had a set training table.
Here's one that's not sports-related: Girls couldn't wear pants to school. How's that one? I remember being in the school revolt to allow us to wear pants. I even wrote a letter to the editor (of the local paper) making my case for allowing pants. We also couldn't wear skirts or dresses that didn't touch the floor when kneeling or be at least finger-tip length. We had to have 2 different wardrobes: pants and mini-skirts/dresses after school and "too long for the 60s & early 70s" skirts/dresses for school. Or, you rolled the waistband of your skirt to make it shorter...

I also remember not being allowed to wear pants to school until 1970. It was a BIG deal in my childhood the year they allowed pants. Once they allowed pants though, the dress code quickly became "whatever your parents allow." My biggest complaint was that boys were allowed to take home ec in high school but girls weren't allowed to take auto mechanics.

 

[altagirl]

How many women, or divas right here, will go out on a date and say "I've got a decent job and I can take care of you if you want to be a ski bum, just make sure dinner is ready and dishes are clean", raise your hand? ;-)

Heh, my husband requests that we figure out this exact situation on a regular basis. No. We can both work until we can afford to both retire. You don't get to retire early.

 

[abc]

Heh, my husband requests that we figure out this exact situation on a regular basis. No. We can both work until we can afford to both retire. You don't get to retire early.

For a year, I was out of work (but not out of money) so I rode with a group of retirees in the SF Bay Area. It's quite interesting. After the ride, since most of us aren't working and got all the time for chores, we would just sat around chitchating over coffee for a while. But a couple of the men would have to leave early so they can get dinner ready for their wives.

Since in most typical couple, the men are older than their wives, they get to retire early. Hence the domestic chores for a few year when the wives are still working. For that generation, it's a definitely a new situation their parents don't experience. But most marriages, if they lasted that long, means the men are flexible enough to adapt...

 

[Jenny]

Heh, my husband requests that we figure out this exact situation on a regular basis. No. We can both work until we can afford to both retire. You don't get to retire early.

Funny. I was going to offer mine up to Rachel, as he'd be delighted to let someone support him while he skis. But he's too old for her.

And when my job is feeling less than secure and I assure him I'd clean and cook if I was only working part-time, he refuses to believe me!

 

[altagirl]

Since in most typical couple, the men are older than their wives, they get to retire early. Hence the domestic chores for a few year when the wives are still working. For that generation, it's a definitely a new situation their parents don't experience. But most marriages, if they lasted that long, means the men are flexible enough to adapt...

It wouldn't be adapting for us - he definitely does more of the cleaning type housework as it is. Not that I don't do anything, but he's a lot more of a neat freak than I will ever be.

But he won't eat most of the healthy food that I cook, and I'm not eating the pizza and crap that he eats all the time so we cook for ourselves most of the time. I doubt that would change even if he was retired. I'd love it, don't get me wrong, if he'd eat healthier, but I don't see it ever happening.

And I get retiring earlier because he's older, but I'm not into being the sugar mama so he can go play all day while I work to support his skiing and biking habits. He tries selling me on how clean the house would be, and I don't doubt him, but I don't really care how clean the house is. And I'd love to quit working and just do yoga and bike and garden and cook all day long too. Haha, needless to say, this is not happening for either of us right now.

 

[bounceswoosh]

I have the opposite situation with DH - I'd like to get to a point where I could work fewer days a week and live in the mountains, but it's kind of pointless because DH loves his job too much, and the cool toys he gets to play with at his job would not be available in a different industry or as a consultant. He doesn't even *want* that!

We know that if I were to quit my job, this is how it would go:

DH: Hi, honey, I'm home!
Me: Hey, sweetie. I am soooo exhausted from mountain biking all day. Could you get some dinner going, please?
DH: ....

 

[Lilywhite]

I also remember not being allowed to wear pants to school until 1970. It was a BIG deal in my childhood the year they allowed pants. Once they allowed pants though, the dress code quickly became "whatever your parents allow." My biggest complaint was that boys were allowed to take home ec in high school but girls weren't allowed to take auto mechanics.

My old school has only started allowing trousers for girls in the last 2 years. I remember having to wear horrible scratchy wool skirts with knee socks and freezing corned beef legs throughout winter then scratchy wool skirts with ankle socks through summer, in my case with sunburn to rival a lobster in terms of redness! I swear I have to get a tan to go from blue skin to white, never mind bronze.