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Skiing Humor Essay (esp funny if you have kids to get ready)

Iwannaski

Angel Diva
Then I have to get them into the skis. They should be able to do this. (Narrator: but they don't.) If they have snow stuck to their boots they need help scraping it off, and 7yo is a great kid who has many fine qualities but balancing on one foot is not one of them, so imagine trying to shove a noodle into a pipe while the noodle is howling at you.

I felt this all the way to my core. FWIW, though, you’re getting them started 4-5 years earlier than I did, so by the times YOURS are the age of MINE, you’re gonna be that chill mom whose kids are super competent.

Tween howling noodles don’t noodle. They just howl.

:yield:

But - and I think this point has been made earlier in this thread - STILL easier than childbirth. LOL.
 

Iwannaski

Angel Diva
Ooooooh, my new jacket is about the color of your pants here, and I think next year when they are back in stock and my ski budget is replenished, I want the flylow sphynx bibs in the color of your jacket ...thank you for demonstrating that I do in fact want that color combo.
 

brooksnow

Angel Diva
I do make my kids put their ski boots on at our house and wear them the 30 minute drive to the ski hill. This has made life so much easier for me.
Our kitchen chairs desperately need refinishing because I realized the mornings went much easier if I insisted that the kids wear their ski boots to breakfast. Ski boots on meant socks, long underwear, and ski pants were also on. Bonus! They're adults now. I'll get around to fixing the chairs eventually.
 

kiki

Angel Diva
I've had multiple conversations recently about what a pain skiing is. :rotf: "The delicate balance of misery and joy that is skiing" is right on.

One of the ways I know I'm getting old is that the primary way I pick ski days now is by how easy they'll be. If the effort required is more than maybe a 6/10, I'm not dealing with it. I'm missing a powder morning right now because no way am I dealing with powder-starved Saturday morning hordes to wait in 20 minute lift lines during a pandemic. You know what will be 90% as fun and 10x easier? Rolling into a sweet parking spot at 1pm and skiing leftovers with zero lines.
So glad to hear I’m not the only one making these choices @RachelV , yes I am weighing the hassle factor this year more so than in prior years, the masks and lineups just have added to the pain of parking and prep/-oh and for me 4 hours of skiing takes an hour or two of stretching in the morning beforehand, after a sleepless night where I had to spend an hour between midnight and 1 am to secure my reservation for the following week. Be happy you only have 20 m lift lines at peak times, that what I face at the lowest part of the day. great article
great article, @SarahXC definitely related, even without the kids.
 

BMR

Ski Diva Extraordinaire
Great article, I definitely laughed. You know what is equally hard? Getting your 12 and 13 year olds to get ready. You would THINK they should know better? Nope. Same issues. 37 layers take 37 hours to put on, ski boots don't fit and then don't get buckled right, wiping out while walking in the parking lot, ski gear falling out of arms one piece at a time... all of it. I am usually drenched in sweat by the time we line up for the lift. But the worst part is the teenage attitude! No longer can you just grab them and go. Heavy negotiations are involved. Trading for electronics time, threats of taking away iphone privileges, etc. Some days just leaving them in the condo to sit on their butt all day while you ski feels like the right parenting decision, lol
 

Iwannaski

Angel Diva
My 12 year old carries his skis in the wood pile carry, and every time I say something, he yells “MOM” at me. So, I just carry mine over my shoulder, as I was taught, and walk as far from him as I can.

And *I’m* the embarrassing one?

(FWIW, he’s stronger than I am... fairly athletic and muscular kid... no reason he can’t carry them in any of the socially acceptable ways)

:rotf:
 

jthree

Ski Diva Extraordinaire
I LOL'd at "haphazardly gathered firewood" and 30 minutes to put on socks. I too have lived this!

My daughter is now 13 and can thankfully put on her own boots. And carries skis on her shoulder too!

In our early years of skiing together, we didn't ski very often (between my work schedule and the fact that her dad doesn't really like to ski). But when we did, I made it a priority to make it enjoyable. Plenty of hot cocoa breaks. No yelling. Going home early if we were just too tired/cold/grumpy to stick it out. Last year and this one too, she is really loving skiing, and I'm feeling like those choices have paid off.
 

Iwannaski

Angel Diva
I LOL'd at "haphazardly gathered firewood" and 30 minutes to put on socks. I too have lived this!

My daughter is now 13 and can thankfully put on her own boots. And carries skis on her shoulder too!

In our early years of skiing together, we didn't ski very often (between my work schedule and the fact that her dad doesn't really like to ski). But when we did, I made it a priority to make it enjoyable. Plenty of hot cocoa breaks. No yelling. Going home early if we were just too tired/cold/grumpy to stick it out. Last year and this one too, she is really loving skiing, and I'm feeling like those choices have paid off.

It’s impossible to get my kids to leave once they start. I’m usually the first to cave. LOL.

Only hot cocoa (and sometimes chips) will lure them off the slopes. They’re still working on the mechanics of getting to the snow... but clearly the half of their genes that come from DH were meant to be winter creatures.

I laugh when I think about how much easier it might be when lockers/lodges/etc return to the mix. They’ve never known that world.
 

ddskis

Certified Ski Diva
OMG that was an awesome way back trip read!! I can’t believe it’s been 25+ yrs since we took our 3 kids skiing, but I was lol and remembering it all like yesterday. And people wondered why we always arrived so late?!
Honestly giving birth naturally w/o drugs was easier than taking all 3 kids skiing for real!
Hubs and I were talking about trying to get our grandkiddos out soon just last week; guess we’re just gluttons for punishment....
 

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