non skiing spouse

[Swamp Dog]

I was just reading some of the older posts and the Valentine's Day thread got me thinking.

Who else has a spouse that does not ski? How about a spouse that didn't ski but eventually learned? How hard was it to get him out there?

I ask because mine looks hopeless. It's one of those things I had hoped we'd be able to do together once the 'empty nest' syndrome struck but I doubt it will happen. He's taken lessons many times and just does not get the hang of it. Last year we got a lesson package for several days and he didn't even do all the lessons, he was that beat, frustrated, and fed up.

Anyone have any similar situations with happy ski endings? Love to hear them of you do!

 

[veggielasagna]

I'm probably not much help as I was actually on the other side of the equation. I wanted to learn how to ski so I could go w/ the fiance. Even though he hadn't been in quite some time he is the reason I ultimately chose skiing over snowboarding (shhhh he doesn't know that!). Very glad I did too
For me it was something I had always wanted to try, but never had the opportunity. It is another thing for us to do together...he is extremely patient if I get into a bind on the slope and talks me through it...
I guess the potential skiier has to want to do it them self or else those first few lessons will be very discouraging...its hard crossing your tips and falling all day on the bunny hill..it seems impossible at first. Perhaps finding two friends to "learn" together might work...men like to compete so that may be incentive to become better.

-veggielasagna

 

[IdahoSkiGirl]

I have been together with my BF for almost 6 years. We are definitely on different levels. He will go up a few times a year. He has fun when he goes but I cannot get him to go on a regular basis. At our local resort they offer a great beginner package that includes 4 lessons, ski lease package, and a season pass after you complete the lessons. I keep trying to convince him to get in the beginner program but he does not want to take lessons. Maybe next year he will ski more.....

 

[lucine]

What if you both tried cross country?
A few times watching you fall and struggle to get up on skinny skis might put him at ease.
Just remember to laugh at yourself.
A few more times, if he gets comfortable, it might be easier to transition to Alpine with new stable shaped skis.


Good luck

 

[dloveski]

My hubby is a Utah native (5th gen), skied since he was a little kid, but skiing is not a burning passion for him anymore. We skied alot before we had kids and when the kids were little, but he's just not that into it since the kids are grown.

He likes to get out there, but these days he's a self-admitted 'fair weather' skier, not into the struggle to get out there in nasty weather and conquer the steeps.

He tells others that I ski enough for both of us this year.

But---if he experienced some new, fatter skiis---who knows????

 

[ski now work later]

How about snowboarding? It's a harder but shorter learning curve, and less gear to futz with (and more comfy boots).

 

[NYSkiGirl]

I recently ended a relationship with a guy who does not ski (or board). It was too hard for me and skiing won. I think that there has to be a compromise in your relationship.

Men typically don't take lessons, it's something about not automatically being an expert. As long as he's understanding about your need to ski then all is well....we did not have that.

 

[skigrl27]

No happy ending here. I divorced my non-skiing spouse. He didn't understand my obsession/passion & usually gave me a hard time for escaping to VT on my own for an entire day. Actually he gave me a hard time with just about everything. He was pathetic.

 

[Solincia]

No happy ending here. I divorced my non-skiing spouse. He didn't understand my obsession/passion & usually gave me a hard time for escaping to VT on my own for an entire day. Actually he gave me a hard time with just about everything. He was pathetic.

I wasn't married, but was in a 5 year relationship with a man like that... Happy to hear that you got out of it! Some people are "soul killers" I say... They just drain you of everything you love!

 

[Ski Spirit]

I learned to ski because my husband wanted me to. But, for me, its a passion. Ironically, DH is a natural athlete and an advanced skier with little training or effort but is not passionate about skiing. I'm lucky though that he does come out occasionally and when he does, we enjoy it together!

 

[Marigee]

My husband doesn't ski. He has a bad back and has no intention of ever skiing. That doesn't stop me - and he doesn't resent me taking time to ski. I will have skied 40 days by the end of the season - with 3 trips out west. He stayed home with our 15 year old twins when I went skiing with our oldest and when I went to Solitude with the divas (going to Vail with the twins for third trip.) He says he's glad I'm doing something I love. We have been married 25 years and I consider him my best friend It's okay to spend time apart and to have different interests. We do a lot of other things together.

 

[Kano]

I have been together with my BF for almost 6 years. We are definitely on different levels. He will go up a few times a year. He has fun when he goes but I cannot get him to go on a regular basis. At our local resort they offer a great beginner package that includes 4 lessons, ski lease package, and a season pass after you complete the lessons. I keep trying to convince him to get in the beginner program but he does not want to take lessons. Maybe next year he will ski more.....

Oh, I LOVE that Passport program! I know I've said it before, but I was sorta tricked into skiing -- DH was a skier before we got married, and when we moved to Boise, he decided we really should start. It was a few years before he got around to it, of course, but he signed us up for this program at the end of the season.

I didn't like it at all, stuck it out because I felt like I had to, and was SO surprised to be excited that the season was coming around again the next fall -- the beginning of a beautiful thing. Seven years later I'm starting to feel like I get it, rather than struggling all the time. Considering I loved skiing while I couldn't do it, can you just imagine how much fun it is suddenly?

Fortunately, he likes to ski too, and I think we're having more fun now that I can keep up with him!

Kano

 

[IdahoSkiGirl]

Oh, I LOVE that Passport program! Fortunately, he likes to ski too, and I think we're having more fun now that I can keep up with him!

Kano

I really like the passport program. I hope by BF tries it next year. He is a very outdoorsy guy and likes skiing but just needs to “put the miles” in.

 

[sibhusky]

My husband doesn't ski anymore. He didn't ski when I met him, learned to ski when we were engaged, and got better than me. Then, once we had a ski house and a baby, he suddenly lost 90% of his interest. I thought when we moved to MT he'd regain it, but the first day out of the first season here, he dislocated his shoulder. Since he'd torn an ACL on a previous "first day" back East, it kind of convinced him he doesn't like skiing. After I hurt myself last year, it was, "If YOU can get hurt (35 years of not getting hurt), then it's really too dangerous for me. Someone has to earn a paycheck."

 

[SkiMave]

Marigee. You're my hero - 40 days with your schedule. Good for you. And here I as thinking 20 days this season was good for me (it is a short season out east) and I work full time !!

My husband is not a great skier. He had a bad car accident in his 20s and has difficulty skiing. Over the years I've gotten quite a bit better than he is. Having said that, I'm fortunate that he likes the ski resort experience. He's happy if he does a few runs, takes it easy, heads in early and then goes for drinks, dinner, etc.

So, we've had a lot of fun over the last few years having at least one ski trip a year at a resort. That way he gets to do some of things he likes (hangin' out, people watching, going for cocktails, going out for a nice meal, and getting some fresh air) and I get to spend the day out on the slopes. He's also very supportive of me going out on my own on the weekends at home - he knows how much I love it, and how much I need the break from work.

So, it works out OK. Going solo this Saturday, then we have Easter weekend booked at Tremblant. What have I learned? Don't push him, find something that he likes to do at the resort, make a holiday out of it and then just go for it !!